Unsound (Just for the song) I must be crazy (crazy), ’cause that’s just how I feel when I’m on stage here, living out my dream. And since I’ve thrown away my education and haven’t made a dime, (I’ve) been pleading with the universe for a reason to my rhyme, but she’s just burning me down. Oh, but I love the songs where I could sing the verse and then you could sing the choruses. And the air feels full of promise, full of hope–I breathe it in. I breathe in. I must be so gone since I’ve stopped myself from thinking that I’m someone they all wanted me to be. Sometimes I wonder if my efforts are all ego or they’re from something real inside of me. And I’ve chosen this existence where we’re always racing time and we’re running on pure passion, leaving everything and everyone behind. I must be crazy. (Crazy, but I feel so alive.) I must be crazy when me and my friends are in our element and we are one–connected by the sound, and the beating of our hearts (is) to the rhythm of the song we sing. On and on just for the song we sing. (All these songs allow me to feel just a little bit. All these words come out and I pray that they understand.) One day we’ll look back and these days will sing forever. They’ll be the anthems to our setting sun. One day we’ll look back and these days will sing forever, my friend, and we’ll sing along. But she’s just burning me down.

Zero. Four. One. We’re only here for a little bit and time keeps moving on. And everyday I think that i should quit…it gets so hard to tell myself that I’m still strong. You know I used to be that guy who’d stay up with you all night and the next day write a song to save his friends. And we used to live our lives in our cars and friday nights but today it gets so easy to forget. Then a song feels like home and it makes you believe when you could not anymore. (You)sing along ’cause it breaks you–you remember that it’s worth fighting for. We’ll never give up. We’ll never look back. I know it hurts for a little bit, but I swear it’ll make you strong. And if the world will hear none of it, we gave it our best, we’ll move along. You know i used to be that guy…well, nevermind. I had a way with words I now forget. But when the winter was too cold, I’d swear those words could warm your soul, but today theyseem routine and so cliche. I’d wait for a lifetime (for) the right four chords and the right rhyme. When we met for the first time, I sang my song and you were mine. Who we are hasn’t even seen the light of day. Who we are hasn’t even, hasn’t even…

Too Far, Too Long All our lives we try to go a little bit faster and those we leave behind, we plan on seeing them after. But there’s an ocean between us now, and it’s been too long. All I can see now are waves sent from the horizon with bottles that they bring with notes of hope for their loved ones. But there’s a lifetime between us now, and it’s been too far. All the words that I’ve wanted to say, I can’t say in these letters. All the pain that your frail voice hides, are you feeling better? We go on with our lives, too afraid to fly ’cause we’re traumatized. All the words that I’ve wanted say, too afraid…too afraid. Then I see the sunrise and words they disappear. Then I hear the strength that your voice hides. “Have no fear,” you tell me, “there’s reason” -that’s all I need to hear. Then you tell me “there’s reason.” That’s all I need. All the words that I’ve wanted to say, I can’t say in these letters. All the pain that your frail voice hides, are you feeling better? Will we go on with our lives, too afraid to fly ’cause we’re traumatized? All the words that I’ve wanted say, too afraid…too afraid. All the words that I’ve wanted to say, I will say in these letters. Hear strength that your frail voice hides, hope you’re feeling better. We’ll go on with our lives, not afraid to fly though we’re traumatized. All the words that I’ve wanted to say are the words that I’m saying.

Sleepless (I see them in this sound) We’re the long drives and talks of hopes and fears. And the warm quiet we’ve sat with all these years. And we’ve also felt like nothing at all–it doesn’t stop us though, we know all we need to know… Flash back to a recent dream where you were face to face with how you feel and you were holding your life in your hands. You laughed and felt so strong and so permament. Thought you could not go on but somehow you did. And I wish that everyone could’ve seen your eyes, I bet they’ve never shined so bright. But more than anything else I wish you could see them in this sound… we’ve been making all these years and the best part is still the feeling that i get from knowing that I do this with you through all the times I was sure we were through. We laughed and felt so strong and so permament. Thought we could not go on, but somehow we did and I wish that everyone could’ve seen our eyes, I bet they’ve never shined so bright. But more than anything else, I wish that you could see them in this sound. And I had a dream that (had) awoken my purpose: jets dropped bombs, missles sent to destroy us. And I was at home with my whole family and we watched as the streets filled with smoke. And the TV had spoken of death and confusion, and what we should do for the bombs they were using. As I watched a dark wave coming fast towards our window, all I could speak of was love. I wish that you could see them in this sound.

My Lost Self Here I am at last with a vision and a pen but my head tells me that I can’t do it again. “Oh no, the time is spent. You’re setting yourself up just to fail. You’re going to waste your time in vain.” But I still remain like the air before the summer, like sunshine after rain. Like the time you and I had met and we knew it right then, but do we forget? do we forget? Do we forget. Here I am again with the ocean and the sand, a breeze, my friend, and the warmest memories we’ve made. Our pain, long days, and everything in between subsides as a wave takes me away. But I still remain like a smile to your temper, like a song that ends your pain. Like the time you and I had met and we knew it right then. But do we forget? do we forget? But am I too far from where you are? Since I’ve convinced myself I’ve lost myself in my lost self, I’ve lost it. Here I am at last…

Cross My Heart If I pretend it’s just a dream will it still bother me? Will it still shake me from my sleep screaming, “you’ve gotta take control of your life. Don’t ignore all your pains. Don’t throw away the one thing you’ve fought to attain.” If I keep running at this pace will it chase after me? Will it wait ’til I lose my breath to take away what I have left behind, scratched from your mind–that’s me in the picture, content at the moment, so happy with life ’cause I feel I’m on top of the world. I know that the world won’t stop if I leave. But tell me you’ll forget me not, no promise me. Cross my heart and hope to live through these memories, because that’s all life really is. A moment’s worth is what you make it–make mine worth a lot. And forget me not. I never told you but sometimes I feel that this world I see has no place for me. But it’s your open arms, honest eyes, attentive smile that can make me feel the seasons they change just for me. And only me. I’m more than just a fucking song. I’m more than just a friend. I’m more than any role this world can place on me. And I’m not afraid to die because I’m not afraid to live while I’m alive. When you think of me, always keep those words in your mind.

I Doubt, Therefore I Think I close my eyes, dear, and begin my life. You know sometimes, I fear, I’m not even alive—I’m just a breath in time (but I could be more). I’m just a waste of time (and I can’t tell what I’m good for). The explosion awakes me at night and I have trouble accepting the fact that you might…Will you walk away from me? Will you walk away?

Regarding a Great Unrest Hey, The memories we’ve made they never really fade. And though we think we change, some parts just stay the same. We try so hard to just put everything away, forgetting who we are and how we got this way. And I’ll admit right now that I took you for granted and I regret it. For what it’s worth, I hope I’ve learned from my mistakes. For what it’s worth I hope, I hope I… Everyday I still think of you and all the things you taught me. Remember that I believe in you and everything you were meant for. You’ve got so much heart inside you—don’t let them take that away, don’t ever forget where you came from. Fast, like the rhythms of the songs we used to play, the seasons passed and dragged us in our separate ways. Though we live differently, we both still think the same: we make the most of life and all it brings our way. And I’ll admit right now that I took you for granted, yeah every second. For what it’s worth, I hope I’ve learned from my mistakes. For what it’s worth I hope, I hope I… When the words “growing up” feel like “growing apart,” the ones that we love have changes of heart, and the lessons we’ve learned we just wish we’d forget, don’t give up, don’t regret, your life’s not over yet. (The memories we’ve made they never really fade. And though we think we change, some parts just stay the same. We try so hard to just put everything away, forgetting who we are and how we got this way.) ‘Cause we’ve learned to believe in ourselves once again. And we’ve learned that we don’t, we don’t have to pretend. And I wish you the best because I’m still your friend. ‘Cause I’ve learned to let go and I know that I can. Everyday I still think of you and all of the things you taught me. Remember that I believe in you… You’ve got so much heart inside you, you’ve got so much heart inside you. You’ve got so much heart. Don’t let them take it away, don’t ever forget where you came from. Don’t you ever forget where you came from.

Fight or Flight We fled from wars and the bombs that leveled homes to the land of opportunity. I still remember that airplane view of toy cities and greenery. Oh, I was only 8-years-old but I remember well mixed feelings of excitement and being scared as hell. Our first year here must be the hardest of our lives—I’ve never seen my mother cry so many times. I remember that I always missed my dad, but we joked a lot, thank God for that. I’d get lost inside my mind when I’d start day dreaming—escape was my solution for just about everything. Is your life only what you want to, only what you want to believe? Do you see only what you want to, only what you want yourself to see? (Is this my life? ‘Cause I’ve been so confused. My memory it lies to me, it’s often of no use. Is this my life? ‘Cause I’ve just gotten used to running from what bothers me and starting over new.) But yet what would I be without my memory? I remember I tried so hard to fit in and learn to speak this language fluently. Inside I never felt like part of the crowd and somehow knew that I could never be. I felt truly alive with paper and a pen, expressing my emotions vividly. And how I could put down what I couldn’t say became a life sustaining part of me. I’d get so lost inside the world I was creating, reality would disappear and so would everything. Is your life only what you want to, only what you want to believe? Do you see only what you want to, only what you want yourself to see? In the blink of an eye, 22 years passed me by and left me what I am: someone that I’m still trying to understand. In the blink of an eye, a whole lifetime has left me with these choices that I’ve made and the consequences of my actions.

The Eternal Optimist We’ve come too far this time to throw away our time, to have us fall to pieces. Our lives are on the line, no longer have the time, to let ourselves just waste this. I, I think I’ll run away again, I think I’ll burn my time again, I think of all the wasted moments that have passed me by. I’m off to live my life this way, I’ll say I’m better off someday for not deceiving myself, expecting more from life. Gotta figure it out, gotta get back gotta, get back to the way it was when we knew the sky’s the limit, and we’d write our names in it some day. Gotta figure it out, gotta get back, gotta get back to the person I was: ambitious and a dreamer—driven by hopes and bigger plans. No I’m not going out like this if I don’t give life my all, I’ll never know… Still got my optimism after all and I may be a fool but I will die before I give in to the pain you suffer through when you tell yourself life’s not worth living. For as long as I’m alive I’ll be dying to find meaning in this life. Now I wake up ready for a brand new day. Though my reflection looks like shit I’m still okay—alive and breathing. And I won’t waste my time trying to impress anybody else. I live my life for those who live their lives for me. “I won’t say a thing without thinking. I won’t live a life without meaning. (Won’t) try less than my best,” a tattoo for the backs of my eyelids says. No I’m not going out like this if I don’t give life my all, I’ll never know… I run my hands through these grains of sand on this Delaware beach where I walk with my friends and the sunrise takes my breath again. As the sun reflects on the ocean’s calm waters, the world as I see it’s in perfect disorder, like a melody that just didn’t make sense ’til the end. There are subtle moments when I see the truth and can stop to appreciate it. Now I don’t fear the end because we’ll always live in what we’ve created. Still got my optimism afterall…

Memories, Meet Dynamite I painted a picture of you in my mind on a brand new white canvas. I admired my work and I fell in love. I stood by it for days, then for weeks, then for months. Then you walked in the room, set my picture on fire. (Are you ready to pay for what you did?) And I looked in dismay at the person I painted. (Are you ready to pay ’cause I can’t forgive) “Oh no, this can’t be you, you couldn’t have acted that way,” I screamed out as my masterpiece went up in flames. I broke down when the ashes spilled on the ground. I looked up at a stranger I thought I had known. Does this mean that I never loved you? Does this mean that I never even knew you at all? I painted a picture of you in my mind. And I left it in black and white. (I drew you like I thought you should be. I drew you so perfectly.) I kept out the details that I didn’t like. And I thought it was perfect. And I knew it was wrong but I painted away. (Are you ready to pay for what you did?) (I) thought that I could convince myself in this way. (Are you ready to pay ’cause I can’t forgive) All the things I denied yet I knew deep inside—it’s so much easier to just lie. So I lied. We stand two feet apart like two strangers unknown. We don’t speak the same language. Are you listening at all? And that look in your eyes never did feel like home but I made it mine. I made it my own. And I think it’d be best if we just stayed away from each other right now, at least just for today. But it’s so easy to miss you. You’re all that I know. ‘Cause I made you mine. I made you my own. I broke down as the ashes had fell on the ground. I looked up at a stranger I thought I had known. Does this mean that I never loved you? Does this mean that I never knew you? Does this mean that I’ll never even know you at all? So we start, start talking again now that we have a new place to begin. And as I’m listening I start to paint you again. Does this mean that I never loved you? Does this mean that I never knew you? Does this mean that I’ll never even know you at all?

Catalina With our eyes focused on a blue and cloudless summer sky, we stole the coast and saved it in iambic lines. So we waited yesterday but our lives begin this moment as cool ocean wind plays on sun-burnt skin. We’ve set out on sudden whims to give reason for our journey. We’re grateful for what’s been and it’s meant everything to me. I feel so alive with you, my life. You are the air I breathe and I can’t get enough. And don’t you worry, the world will know our story. And it was written for you. And I will turn the darkest sky to fireworks of dreams come true. So let’s drive on the roads made by imaginary lines. We’ll leave the windows down tonight and we’ll play all our favorite songs or maybe just enjoy the silence. We’ll hear the summer wind whisper in our ears. You know now the reason you were brought down. Don’t let it leave you. Don’t let it leave you helpless and if you slow down, just take in this moment, I promise it will leave you. It will leave you breathless. Oh it will leave you. It will leave you breathless. So we waited yesterday but our lives begin this moment as cool ocean wind plays on sun-burnt skin.

Drown Truth always hits me in the face like a bag of bricks and I swing blindly with whatever words or weapons I could find. And I always end up leaving thinking “how’d things get so bad?” When the answer’s right in front of me. When the answer is myself. (When I look at myself, (I) see how things get so bad. The answer’s in the mirror. The answer’s myself.) So press stop. Press rewind. Play that part right there and watch yourself cross every line. (I can start this now). I can turn this around. I can start this all over as somebody new. (I swear I won’t) I swear I won’t let you down. No, not this time, not again (just say that you love me). Just say the words you still love me. Not this time, not again (just say that you love me). Just say the words you still…You still love. And I’ll do anything, I swear. And now regret fills me as I see how much I’ve hurt you. I keep repeating to myself, that’s it this time I lost you. And then a scene plays in my mind: The ocean waves crash softly, you whisper ‘hey you’ in my ear and say how much you love me. (The ocean it crashes in my mind so softly. Your whispers they haunt me and tell me you love me.) Just stop. Press rewind. Play that part right there and watch yourself cross every line. But I let you down, so just let me… But I let you down. (I can start this now as somebody new. I swear I won’t). We’re so scared of each other.

The Surgeon I’ll cut deeper into you with each careful incision. I’ll cut away the tissue and excess pieces of you. I’ve taken up medicine and I’ve forgotten what a full night of sleep means just to bring back what I can’t, just to find out that I’m cutting at the surface. And still I hold my head up high and tell myself I’ll fix you. I close my eyes and turn my head away from what’s left of you. I will not let go until I’m sure that you are… (As we breathe our lives away, we hold on to what we feel we can’t replace.) There’s no excuse because this life is in my hands. Though shaking helplessly, they must cut with precision. I hear “it’s useless” whispered many times inside my head. There’s no excuses—I’m responsible, not them. As we breathe our lives away, we hold on to what we feel we can’t replace. As we breathe our lives away, as we breathe away. Just breathe in one more time. I swear that I could save your life. And still I hold my head up high and tell myself I’ll fix you. I close my eyes and turn my head away from what’s left of you. I will not let go until I’m sure that you are dead. As I breathe my life away, I hold on to you.

A Sense of Purpose Congratulations, ’cause it looks like you’ve found what you’ve been looking for. And goodbye, ’cause I guess we wont be seeing you anymore. But you’ve made a habit of letting your friends down. Well as long as you’re happy, well that’s all that matters just forget your friends, you can turn your back on us. It’s alright, it’s your life, I wont be the one to ruin all your fun and tell you: I hope that they make you real happy to make up for all the friends you’ll lose. Do you remember when your friends meant everything to you? Do you? And every word you spoke I trusted and believed ’cause I thought you practiced what you preached. And when you hear this, you won’t speak to me anymore ’cause these words will cut you deeper than anything you’ve heard before. But it’s been burning the tip of my tongue for a while now. I’m sorry it’s something that needs to be said and the truth hurts, my friend but this is where its lead. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still your friend even if you choose to sever all your ties with me. I hope you don’t take this the wrong way. I’m sorry but this is how I feel. I feel these words will just fall on deaf ears and will push you so far away. But each day it gets worse, yet I call you my friend so I won’t bite my, won’t bite my tongue today. (I fear these words will push you away. Will they sever the ties between us?) Congratulations. Got something better now. Did you lose yourself when I lost my best friend? Did someone else find you and are you happy with them?

Still I hoped you’d come back for me, so I sat down and waited. The air was blowing cold and people stared as they walked past. But I sat so still and just waited there for you. With a focused look you headed towards the corner and I ran like a child after you. And I can’t remember words that I was saying while you put the night in picture frames. You were taking photographs while I hovered by your side. So you can catch this night on film and I can keep it in my mind. You were taking photographs of lights and city life, while I just took it all in by your side. And the train ride home that night was spent in silence while you held my hand like we first met. And it hit me then, that we were both still children—afraid of letting go the hand we’ve held. So I held you close just like your photographs have held on to that night. And why be adults when it takes a child to forgive throughout this life? And what matters most is that we’re able to believe when all seems lost. So why be adults? I hoped you’d come back for me, so I sat down and waited. The air was blowing cold and people stared as they walked past. But I sat so still and just waited there for you.

I Think, Therefore I Am I close my eyes, dear, and begin my life. You know sometimes, I fear, I’m not even alive—I’m just a breath in time (but I could be more). I’m just a waste of time (and I can’t tell what I’m good for). Awakened by an explosion. Gasping for air. I realize I’m breathing but I’m not so sure that I’m alive at all. Do your thoughts drive you insane when something inside keeps saying that you can’t live your life this way? I close my eyes, dear, and begin my life. You know sometimes, I fear, I’m not even alive—I’m just a breath in time but I could be more (and a breath won’t last). I’m just a waste of time and I can’t tell what I’m good for (but your time has passed you). So now I stand on my own and feel the weight of choices I have made alone. You know it kills me to live so consciously. So consciously, I fight my fears for my control of me. So I can break free. To live for others I believed was something that’s a part of me and sure enough I aimed to please ’til there was nothing left of me. I was no altruist but I gave myself away. Thinking it’ll all make sense one day. One day it will make sense to me. All the years we spent so desperate to find answers we already knew if we close our eyes. And just look inside ourselves and think, “Am I really who I want to be or do I live for someone else’s dream? Am I living someone else’s dream?” (You know that you can start over again). No one else can live my life so it’s time to live it consciously right now. I’m feeling more alive than I have ever felt and I’m a sacrifice to no one. And when I close my eyes, I’ll know I did my best, it’s time to rest. I close my eyes, dear, and begin my life. You know sometimes, I fear, I’m not even alive—I’m just a breath in time but I could be more (and a breath won’t last). I’m just a waste of time and I know what I’m good for. Oh the way these thoughts, they complicate our happy endings; it’s never ending. The battles that I’ve fought have brought me to my knees. Oh the way these thoughts… So now I stand on my own and feel the weight of choices I have made alone. You know it kills me to live so consciously. So consciously, I fight my fears for my control of me. So I can break free. Break free.

Hidden Track: Twilight Mimosa I don’t know just how it happened. I’ve always thought I’ve had it figured out and now I have nothing but questions. A heart that’s full of fear, a head filled with doubt. You seem to have all the answers but I’ve always been quite the skeptic. Hey beautiful, will you grace city streets with me by your side? We’ll lose ourselves and I’ll selfishly hope to find myself in your eyes. The city air smells of autumn, coffee, cigarettes, and speeding cars. And flashing signs, though we ignore them, guide us like beacons through the night. We don’t need a map or directions, we’ll just float where this pavement will take us. Hey beautiful, will you grace city streets with me by your side? We’ll lose ourselves and I’ll selfishly hope to find myself in your eyes. Though we may never go back home. Though we may never go.

(Words Transcribed By Lucas Elgarten – Thanks Lucas!)

The Jumpoff Summer It’s Missy’s house on weeknights, Pete’s car on warmer Saturdays. I’d like it if the clouds moved, and made me look like someone else today. It’s waking up past two and three calls to make plans for the day. It’s “check out this quote I found, I’m really feeling that today.” Breaking a promise to myself, but keeping one to my friends. I’m not missing out. It’s “you know you’re the better guy, you were too good for her, yeah she’s the one that’s missing out, she stopped returning calls.” I’m not missing out. Definitely not. $6.50 for the cab and 5 bucks to think the night away.  Frustration after practice, and asking why the fuck we played. It’s shotgun in your car and “don’t bother me till I’m awake.” It’s taking sides in battles, trying to figure out who’s fake. Breaking a promise to myself, but keeping one to my friends. I’m not missing out. It’s the only reason I was going is because id see you there but the only thing I saw tonight is how much you really care. I’m not missing out. Definitely not, no definitely not. I wont waste a minute of your time (minute of your time). It’s night we talked at strangers houses, should I walk you home do you hate me by now? My thinking wasn’t oh so wrong. I wont waste a minute of your time. I know why you hate me this time.
It’s pouring hearts out on those steps about doing things you might regret for the sake of someone, and why you need that person. It’s time spent dying for a change, and “I cant go out like this today” until words in a letter, proved you, yourself, knew better. It’s Friday night 5 nights a week.  No plans, four cars, one fake ID and you can’t take that from me, no you can’t take that from me.
It’s why its taken me so long, to sit down and write this song, to let go of someone, and to enjoy my summer.

Out of Words There’s nothing left to say, ‘cause the story has been read, did you read it long ago? Did you forget the end? The part that made you cry, well I tore those pages out. Yeah I’ll rewrite it on my own, when I find some time. Can one spend all his thoughts? I think its happened once before. Can one think way too much? I don’t think that’s my case.  Maybe its because I watch too much TV, there’s never enough time to re-collect my thoughts.

Is something wrong with me ‘cause I fall too hard, got no tricks up my sleeves maybe I should get some…and those words they hurt the most cause they’re from the heart, sticks and stones may break my bones but words tear me apart. Out of words. Maybe I said too much.  And if I spoke too much, I’m sorry that I did ‘cause there’s never enough time, to re-collect my thoughts. I’m out of words

Given up on Giving Up The wrong things got me down, I turn my back on what I love the most well….I thought you’d let me down, but I can clearly make it on my own and I want you to know, that I’m not backing down, I’ve given up on backing down. I want you to know, that I’m not giving up, I’ve given up on giving up. Cause I’m my only hope in this world. And I’m not lonely ‘cause I’m my only hope in this world. Back to the same routine, that ive been following, for the past ten years of my life. But now’s a different scene, and I’m the one who chose to volunteer my time. I want you to know, that I’m not backing down, I’ve given up on backing down.(that’s the only thing, the only thing I know) I want you to know, that im not giving up, (I know for certain that I cant let this go). How can you say you’re my friend, when all you do is pretend, wont let me down again. I’ve waited for this to end I got my fist in my hand, you wanna talk again? (I made a decision, i’m not sitting out this one) How can you say youre my friend, when all you do is pretend, wont let me down again. I’ve waited for this to end I got my fist in my hand, you wanna talk again?

Ironic Last Words Why should I say anything to you? You don’t seem to mind I’ve disappeared, completely cut myself from you.  Why should I shred my vocal chords for you? The numbness (has) long since worn away yet each word still cuts at my throat just the same.
But every now and then I think about how you’re doing and how things coulda been–the irony in what you said, “Can’t you stand up for yourself, they’re walking all over you?” Well I did, and you’re gone ’cause you fled the scene. Did you think that I was that easy to break, who needs hatred when there’s rage, because I don’t hate you.. Lucas: (the truth is you can slit my throat, and with my one last gasping breath, id hack at your face with a meat cleaver….) you ran away now, now wake tomorrow consumed by your own guilt.
What’s the matter? Don’t you like my shirt? What’s the matter? It still got your bloody little handprints all over . Shoudn’t you be proud?
With every pause in my lines and every sigh from my mouth you’ll feel the pangs of your guilt as you scream out loud. Just realize what you did, Just realize what you did.

Bottlecap These days are flying before my eyes. And my life is changing.  Sometimes I feel that if I blink too long, I’ll waste a moment.  And the future scares me, in ways it never has before.  What am I doing all this for?Tonight I think I’ll lose my breath Seems I’ve already lost my voice, I let this pen drop to the floor. Don’t think I can do this anymore. And then the phone rings and I talk to you for hours. Hang on to every word you say. The comfort of your voice on a Thursday midnight hour. It warms my soul and tells me everything is going to be okay.
Words cannot describe the feeling that I feel when you are near. What can I begin to give the one I owe so much to? Can you feel my heart its burning through my chest when you are near. With all my heart and soul I love you. With my heart and soul I..

Startled You are my nights’, startled sky….never mine. When all my fears are gone(and all the words I’ve meant to say). And theres no doubt in my mind (burning the tip of my tongue). You turn your back and now I’ve gotta start over. Cant even look me in the eyes. We’re still friends what’s the difference, right? Don’t forget that I can discard you, at any moment that i choose to. Don’t forget that my sympathies running thinner every day I see you. You forget what I once meant to you. Don’t leave me alone. Why cant we just talk about this? You and your childish conversation. When will you grow up and see this for what it could be? You and your childish conversation.

To a Friend You know I’ve always meant to thank you but its always slipped my mind. I’m sorry if it seems I’m always too wrapped up in myself. Well if friendship is the only thing in which I haven’t yet lost trust, I have only you to thank. All the world may break to pieces and every cloud may turn to stone. Time may give back all its taken. But I am not alone. This may be the only chance I’ve got, to say thanks a lot. Its been appreciated. If on short notice I may leave and you need more reason to believe, take comfort in what you’ve done, its always meant the world to me. Time will take away all its given. Time can’t touch what you have given to me.

Cross My Heart If I pretend it’s just a dream will it still bother me? Will it still shake me from my sleep? Screaming: “You’ve got to take control of your life. Don’t ignore all your pains. Don’t throw away the one thing you fought to attain.” If I keep running at this pace will it chase after me? Will it wait ‘til I lose my breath to take away what I have left behind, scratched from your mind. That’s me in the picture, content at the moment, so happy with life because I feel I’m on top of the world. And I know that the world won’t stop if I leave. (Can you see me on that stage now empty this evening? Screaming my lungs out still for you I’m singing.) But tell me you’ll forget me not. No promise me. (Can you see me right now on the sand by that ocean? Headphones still blaring, heart dreaming devotion.) Cross my heart and hope to live through these memories because that’s all life really is. A moment’s worth is what you make it, make mine worth a lot and forget me not. I never told you but sometimes I feel that this world I see has no place for me. But it’s your open arms, honest eyes, attentive smile that can make me feel the seasons they change just for me, and only me. I’m more than just a fucking song. I’m more than just a friend. I’m more than any role this world can place on me. And I’m not afraid to die because I’m not afraid to live while I’m alive. When you think of me, always keep those words in your mind.

Gift For Hope Three years. Is there still time? Will I accept the fact that I can’t make you mine? Oh what a dream you still remain. While my undying hope for us is still the same. But I learned no matter how much you try, sometimes you just can’t outsmart life. So like Daisy and Gatsby, we could never be. It goes to show for this little dream of mine. Because of her he built a life. Everything he made reflected her desires. Kind of like what I have tried to do: Surround myself with all the things that might please you. It’s kind of sad how hard he tried through his life and the way he died. Everything he bought for her, everything but he couldn’t buy her heart. Tomorrow’s promise to bring new hope is the only thing I have, the only thing I need. Each time I wake up it’s with me again and my dreams are all I have. My dreams are all I need. It’s bringing me down building me up to bring me down.

All I Say Somewhere down the line there was a vision once so clear, a picture of a million words but that picture disappeared somewhere down the line, I tell myself it’s for the best. Even though its hard to see, I know this picture wouldn’t last. At seventeen I learned never to be sure, sure of what will happen. Sure of what’s deserved. And I’m not saying I don’t believe in anything, I’ve just learned that some things aren’t what they seem. I am a rock therefore I feel no…Goodbye and so long are all I say to you and I can move on because I feel no…Because I am a stone, that shit don’t phase me. Take that picture once so clear, burn it into ashes. Make that picture disappear but don’t regret your actions.

Staying Home From School If the world would end afternoon tomorrow and our souls were all that’s left, oh how ugly I would be. And if I brought to you little more than sorrow, I wouldn’t blame you if you wished all that sorrow upon me. But if not I guess I have another chance to make things right for us. But please forgive me if I don’t ‘cause I don’t know what else to do. You know I tried so hard? These walls we built, I always knew they’d fall apart. If the sun refused to bring light tomorrow, I wouldn’t beg it to. I don’t deserve it anyway. Because behind the mask hides a horrid creature: A selfish kid that thought love shouldn’t come with so much pain. And so I threw it all away, monotonous words that tore our sky that night and for the first time in my life I felt my heart and mind collide. I made a choice to do what’s right followed the way I felt inside. Wish you could see it through my eyes. Wish you could see it through these bloodshot windows to my soul. Wish you could see it through my eyes. Wish you could somehow maybe act like nothing’s wrong. And now I finally realize why she kept questioning the way I feel inside. You never thought I’d let you but you can’t say I never tried.